Okay, so I know that this is a film blog…but let’s face it, no one gives a fuck about my opinions on classic films. So I’m sure you, my couple of followers, will forgive me for this slightly…well extremely, off-topic post. I want you to be aware of this wonderful piece of ‘journalism’, right here.



So apparently the Daily Mail are not only racist, xenophobic homophobes, they also hate the poor. So much so that they have sent their scruffiest ‘journalist’ to steal from them. This anti-Robin Hood piece of shit either took it upon himself, or at least agreed to publish a story in which he goes ‘undercover’ and lies to charity in order to show the Britons among us that belong in the giraffe group (Desperate Housewives reference – I’m basically calling DM readers ‘thick’), how easy it is to abuse the system when you’re a lying scum bag.

Seriously, this story made me well up a bit, like actual liquid in my eyes. I AM A woMAN. I DO NOT CRY.

He claims he received the food vouchers ‘no questions asked’, despite being asked many questions. I’m not entirely sure what his angle was, what am I supposed to hate the charitable nature of food banks? Because the way I see it, they were not willing to let a fellow human being go without food. THE SHAME. I don’t know about you, but when I give to charity, I don’t expect the receiver of my donation to succumb to humiliation. Oh hello starving child in Africa, I know you’ve supplied me with all the relevant information I need to want to help you, but I will also require a stool sample, a picture of your mother’s breasts and a human sacrifice, preferably a virgin.

Look, I know that there may be some despicable people in the world that will abuse charities like these, whether it’s to save their food money for drugs, or to make fools of good honest people, or to write a news article about how much they hate the poor, but if I want to take the risk and donate money so that other people may be able to feed their fucking families, I will.

If you hate this newspaper as much as I do, I recommend donating a little bit of money (if you can) to counteract any harm this son-of-a-bitch may have caused.

Text EGGS88 to 70070, followed by £2 (or whatever you want), just think how great it would be for this disgusting little oxygen thief to wake up to the news that the charity he so desperately wanted to put down, actually had a huge rise in charitable donations.

This rant isn’t over, sorry. But the Daily Mail have this whole ‘proud to be British’ bullshit going on, how can you possibly be ‘proud to be British’ when shit like this happens?

The charity itself, makes me proud. The Daily Mail, makes me sick. They seem to believe that by having a country full of people that happened to be born on this land mass is a reason to be proud. No, what makes a country truly great isn’t that. It’s culture, and scenic views but above all, a country that you can be truly proud of is a country worth living in, with people that care about other people. Doing good things, like helping the poor, being kind to one another. Being born here, has nothing to do with that. Please don’t let the very few bad examples that the Daily Mail publish, make you believe that foreign people living here is the cause for Britain’s problems, when it’s actually people that believe that garbage are the main problem. It’s not enough to have a passport with a unicorn on it, you need to get off your ass and do something for someone. You need to help people when they are in need, you need to tolerate the people that you don’t really get on with and you need to love your fellow man unconditionally. Immigrants chose to move here, give them a reason to be proud of their choice. Accept them, make them feel welcome. Asylum seekers don’t get that choice, they are forced to leave their homes and come to a strange new country where they don’t know our culture, they may not even know our language. Why would you treat those people badly? How would feel if that was you, or someone you loved? Do something spectacular. Do something kind. Kindness is the most important thing, the only important thing. Let these people write home to their families and friends, as proud of Britain as you are. Let us be proud, let Europe be proud, let the world be proud and remember – pride comes through achievements, not where your mum opened her legs.


So do it, go outside right now (take a coat, it’s Britain) and just be the best person you can be. If you don’t have a coat and it’s raining, just make up a pot of tea, pop some crumpets in the toaster and watch a British film.


So this is the most nationalist thing I have ever said, but I like to think it’s true. So God bless the queen and all her corgis,  and fuck Ross Slater and the Daily Mail in the arse. RANT OVER.


P.s. Ross, I don’t have much food in at the moment, but I think I have some curly fries and a red onion you can help yourself to, no questions asked.



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